Marie's Spiffy Journal

I FIGURED OUT HOW TO DO USER PICTURES!!!! WOOOO!

Thu, 24 Feb 2005 15:24:21 GMT

hahahaha! im sooo happy now! i still cant get the one olivia gave me but this will work for the time being. lacy found it for me. yay. not much goin on here. stupid school board is really weird. they canceled school and it didnt even start snowing until like 20 minutes ago. i was startin to think it wasnt ever gonna snow. weird. oh well. im gonna go call amanda so we can obsess over Phantom of the Opera some more. yay!!!!! welcome to my life. haha. oh! i should find a phantom user pic. oh well, ill stick with this one for a while, then look for phantom pics. yay! im saying that an awful lot. lol. well, bye 4 now.

survey

Sun, 20 Feb 2005 17:03:40 GMT

this had better work

Bored? ((Over 100 questions))
Created by xSwtLilAngel666x and taken 70494 times on bzoink!
[x] Part 1 -- The Basics [x]
What's your name? ::	Rachel
Birthplace ::	York
Age ::	14
Age you act ::	hmmm 15 maybe?
Current location ::	Abbottstown (close to New Oxford and Hanover)
Eye color ::	blue
Hair color ::	brown
Right, lefty or ambidextrous? ::	righty
Zodiac sign? ::	Saggitarius (teh archer 4 all u slow ppls)
Height? ::	5' 2 1/2" yea pssssh im short Kelly Clarkson says short ppl rule!
[x] Part 2 -- Describe... [x]
Your heritage/nationality ::	ummm I think I'm German I know im like 1/8 Irish lol
Your hair ::	brown and oooh i just got it cut so shoulder-length now with really short wispy bang like things in the front hehe my mom doesnt like them even though she says she does
Your fears ::	ummm being unloved gasp now the whole world knows!
Your perfect room ::	big! ooh with a stage! and a huge stereo and big tv so i can have massive sleepovers! (i was limited to 5 ppl other than myself last time and we still slept in the living room
What you practically do in a day ::	um, hullo! EVERYTHING!!! XD school, hw, phone, internet, writing, reading, dance class (except tues., then karate) and cheerleading cept now its over, oh and eat and sleep
[x] Part 3 -- What is/are... [x]
Words you overuse ::	queer, retard
Phrases you overuse ::	stupid idiotic retarded moron(s), We're gonna be slappin some ppl around here, they'res gonna be (name of person)'s everywhere!
Your first thought when you wake up ::	school days, its "god, school again?" and weekends and days off its "woo! computer!"
Your greatest accomplishment ::	ummm, dancing and not screwing up too bad on the cruise ship in front of sooooooo many ppl
Something you want to do ::	ummm go visit Avary in her house in Harrisburg - I miss her!
[x] Part 4 -- This or that [x]
Pepsi or Coke ::	Pepsi
McDonald's or Burger Kings ::	McDonalds!!!! hate burger king
Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera ::	ewww i have to pick one? no plz, unless its whos skankier, no, wait, thats too hard, too.
Chocolate or vanilla ::	chocolate candy, vanilla ice cream/milkshakes, chocolate cake, vanilla cappuccino XD im difficult
Adidas or Nike ::	umm Nike, i guess, just cuz my pretty cheer shoes this year were Nike
Black or white ::	black
Bills or Coins ((Think $$$)) ::	bills
Burgers or hot dogs ::	hot dogs
Egypt or France ::	FRANCE!!!
Rock or rap ::	rock
[x] Part 5 -- Do you...[x]
Smoke ::	I TOLD YOU A MILLION TIMES, THERE IS NO COKE IN MY ROOM! OR MY PURSE!!!
Cuss ::	not now, i gave it up for lent!!!! urg i could say sumthing right now but I GAVE IT UP FOR LENT!!!! sorry avary i do a little bit not often
Sing well ::	haha, debatable
Sing in the shower ::	are you stalking me? how do you know that?
Talk to yourself --a lot-- ::	now you're making fun of me
Believe in yourself ::	what? what does that even mean?
Like taking these longass surveys? ::	not if ur going to ask me dumbbutt questions
Play an instrument ::	clarinet, woooo! and a teeny tiny bit of accoustic guitar
Want to go to college? ::	yea
Want to get married? ::	yea
Want to have children? ::	only one, hopefully, then i dont have to worry about fighting
Think you're a health freak? ::	um, no! though ppl think i am cuz im so skinny sum ppl even think im anorexic
Get along with your parents ::	ummm sumtimes
Get along with your siblings? ::	adam, yes. jason, no. okay, maybe a little
Think you're popular ::	i think most ppl know who i am, but i hate the word "popular" it means too many diff. things to too many diff. ppl
[x] Part 6 -- In the past month have you..[x]
Gone out of state ::	ummm dont think so
Drank alchohal ::	ummm not in the past month hahaha
Smoke ::	QUIT GETTIN ON ME ABOUT THAT COKE!!!!
Get high ::	WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO PROVE??!!
Done any drugs ::	GOOD GOD LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
Eaten an entire box of oreos ::	umm no
Been on stage ::	in a month? ummm no dont think so
Gone skinny dipping ::	no
Been dumped ::	no
Dyed your hair ::	no :(
Stolen anything ::	unless downloaded music counts
[x] Part 7 -- Your friends! =D [x]
Craziest ::	Jess or me or Lacy
Loudest ::	Lacy
Most shy ::	Emily
Blondest ::	umm Lacy or me (yea i kno im not blonde leave me alone)
Smartest ::	wow most of us are in alg 2 so olivia, kathleen, jess are tied even sarah even though shes not with us
Kindest ::	umm Avary
Best personality ::	Kathleen prolly
Most talented ::	hmmm Kathleen maybe or Sarah, idk maybe Avary or Jess, ya know, we're all pretty talented Lace and me 2! haha
Best singer ::	idk used to be Lacy but debatable now with Kathleen
Most ghetto ::	Olivia, uh-oh oreo!
Drama Queen ((or King XP)) ::	me and lacy put together as sum1 said one time idk who it was
Pain in the ass ::	Lacy XDXD
The one you just want to strangle to death ((Homer Simpson style))::	Brittany S
Funniest ::	Jess
Best person for advice ::	Kathleen
Dependable ::	Mandy and Kathleen and Jess
Trustworthy ::	wow idk ne more Avary prolly or Katie and Janet
Druggie ::	me? XD i mean NO!
Most likely to end up in jail ::	XDXD me or olivia! :P or Lacy
Person you've known the longest ::	Avary
[x] Part 8 -- The Last... [x]
Last dream ::	last night was weird, ya know, idk even know what it was
Last nightmare ::	ummm i dont remember
Car ride ::	yesterday comin back from the Church set up Valentines Dance thingy
Last time you cried ::	last night cuz my head hurt and i was tryin to get a million things done and all i wanted to do was go to bed
Last movie seen ::	Napoleon Dynamite god that was stupid
Last movie rented ::	Napoleon Dynamite
Last book read ::	I'm reading Phantom of the Opera right now but i just finished Across Five Aprils for English
Last word said ::	table, i believe
Last curse word said ::	i dont remember, it was sooo long ago, asshole i think
Last time you laugh ::	ummm i think on the phone with amanda last night
Last phone call ::	called alicia but never got ahold of her last night
Last CD played ::	Phantom of the Opera Disc one
Last song you listened to ::	like all of them but i think it was Music of the Night
Last annoyance ::	stupid pop ups on teh internet
Last IM ::	Sarah and Katie it keeps switching
Last weird encounter ::	umm my dog coming in and out of my room actually that was more annoying cuz i was tryin to sleep
Last person you hugged ::	ummm Lacy i think when i left her house yesterday
Last person you yelled at ::	my dog, Mogul
Last time you wore a skirt ::	umm last cheerleading game i think its too cold to wear a skirt unless i have to so that was 2-4 i think it was
Last time you've been evil ::	to my dog this morning
Sarcastic? ::	umm 5 minutes ago typing on here
Last time you fought with your parents ::	yesterday
Last time you wished upon a star ::	i dont know!!! gosh!
Played Truth or Dare ::	i think it was at jessies sleepover on halloween
Spent quality time alone ::	ummm yesterday on the computer, no, right now on the computer
[x] Part 9 -- I swear this is the last one! -- Randomness [x]
Are you talking to someone on AIM ::	Jess and Sari and Katie
Do you feel lonely ::	not really
Ever TP'd someone's house ::	umm no dont think so
How about egging someone's house ::	no
Do you not like dislike not like me? ::	what? i know you confuse me
Ain't Eminem and 50 Cent just fine? ::	umm eminem yea 50 cent i could do w/out
Yo Momma ::	Yo Face
Ever been so hungry you felt like you could eat the person next to you? ::	yea
What do you think of George Bush? ::	BUSH CHENEY 04 ALL THE WAY!
Any secret fetishes? ::	wait, gotta look up the word fetish okay abs and arm muscles but wait, thats not secret oh well it wouldnt be now even if it were b4 so....
Do you like to wear chains? O_o ::	um this one that has moons and stars on its not very big i like that one
How many languages do you speak? ::	um one fluently but a little french, spanish, and japenese, and im taking spanish next year and the year after that then french 4 two years and hopefully japenese in college
Damn.. are your fingers tired? Cause mine sure are! ::	umm not really
Glad this is over? ((Say yes and I'll stalk you =P)) ::	i have a stalker dont need another...so...yes?
Create a Survey \| Search Surveys \| Go to bzoink!

wtf?

Mon, 07 Feb 2005 21:10:01 GMT

wtf? alex went to the movies saturday b4 ufc, and apparently he was with a girl. god. all that stressin 4 nuthin. i got all stressed cuz i didnt tell him about carson. i still havent, but he hasnt told me about goin to the movies with a girl, either. i knew he went to see boogieman, but greg (his dad) told sabrina that he was with a girl, and she told my mom, who told me. muwahahahahaha. well, i guess we'll find out which one of us cracks first. course, that doesnt mean shes his gf, but still.....

Sat, 29 Jan 2005 18:59:28 GMT

Icons about everything!! (good icons too!!) by truelove
Name
Word that best describes you
Icon that describes you
Icon that describes your life
Icon that reminds you of someone you love
Icon that reminds you of someone you hate
The one you will marry
The one you want to marry

Quiz created with MemeGen!

thingy stolen from olivia (bostonbroncos)

Sat, 29 Jan 2005 18:34:10 GMT

Here's a quiz thing. Write down the first thing that comes to mind when you read the questions. Then scroll down! DON'T CHEAT!!

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite
sex.
2. Which is your favorite color out of red,
black, blue, green, yellow?
3. Your first initial?
4. Your month of birth?
5. Which color do you like more, black or white?
6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.
7. Your favorite number?
8. Do you like California or Florida more?
9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?
1o. Write down a wish. (A realistic one).

WHEN YOU'RE DONE, SCROLL DOWN
(DON'T
CHEAT)

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THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person.

2. If you choose:
Red - You are alert and your life is full of
love.

Black - You are conservative and aggressive.

Green - Your soul is relaxed and you are laid
back.

Blue - You are spontaneous and love kisses
and
affection from the ones you love.

Yellow- you are a very happy person and give
good advice to those who are down.

3. If your initial is:
A-K You have a lot of love and friendships in
your life.

L-R You try to enjoy your life to the maximum
and your love life is
soon to blossom.

S-Z You like to help others and your future love
life looks very good.
4. If you were born in:

Jan-Mar: The year will go very well for you and
you will discover that you fall in love with
someone totally unexpected.

April-June: You will have a strong love
relationship that will not last long but the
memories will last forever.

July-Sep: You will have a great year and will
experience a major life changing experience for
the good.

Oct-Dec: Your love life will not be too great,
but eventually you will find your soul mate.

5. If you chose...
Black: Your life will take on a different
direction, it will seem hard at the time but
will be the best thing for you, and you will
be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely
confides in you and would do anything for you,
but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you have in
your lifetime.

8. If you chose:
California: You like adventure.
Florida: You are a laid back person.

9. If you chose:
Lake: You are loyal to your friends and to your
love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please
people.

1o. This wish will come true only if you RE-
POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour., and it will come
true before your next birthday

Sun, 23 Jan 2005 22:40:30 GMT

http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=xGingerxxSpicex grr this better work this time

New Site

Sun, 23 Jan 2005 22:37:15 GMT

I created a new site. It's a xanga, not a livejournal, cuz so many ppl read xangas. plus i don't nessicarily want everyone reading this, and im gonna put the xanga link in my aim profile, so everyone who reads this, plz keep reading, as i will continue to update, but if u want to see my xanga, which has an awesome background, as i dont know how to format lj, and as it will have different posts than my livejournal, you are free to look at my xanga, at http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=xgingerxxspice at least that should be right. if its not, i'll post another entry with the correct link. if i dont, its correct. k thats it for now thnx for reading.

Fri, 21 Jan 2005 01:32:47 GMT

RACHEL
R	is for	Remarkable
A	is for	Abstract
C	is for	Cheeky
H	is for	Handy
E	is for	Explosive
L	is for	Luscious

What Does Your Name Mean?

You Are 25 Years Old

25

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Fri, 21 Jan 2005 00:18:19 GMT

went to the bball game today....varsity cuz stupid delone doesnt have a jv team, so we didnt have to go since we didnt have to cheer, but me and manderz and carson went n so did a whole bunch of kids from school. it was cool; carson leaned back in the bleachers and had his arm across the back of them and he kept poking me in the back while i called mom to tell her the game had 3 more minutes left, and when i got off the phone, i just casually slid back so that his arm was now around me while i sat back in the bleachers. tee hee :D. and bradley e was like, "u kno u have to put ur arm around him, too," but amanda got him to shut up. lol. ugh, hope im not too sick not to go to school. im going if i can help it. pep rally tomorrow and we get to do our dance, and im REALLY excited, since, u kno, stupid biglerville had to cancel the game on tuesday and we didnt get to do our dance. the varsity squad did theirs today. was pretty good. ne way, i think thats it 4 now. buh bye

I took pretty quizzes with pretty results!!!

Sun, 16 Jan 2005 19:57:08 GMT

Thu, 30 Dec 2004 15:52:24 GMT

What stupid celebrity are you destined to kill? by daydreamer8852
Name
Birthdate
You killed
With a
On	March 3, 2023

Quiz created with MemeGen!

That's awesome! I HATE N'Sync, or most specifically, justin timberlake. wahahahahaha! I shall run them ALL over! Muwahahahahaha! K, RECAP: carson and i are NOT, i repeat, NOT going to kiss anytime soon, OLIVIA!!!! She doesnt get it. lol. XD :D. neway, we do enjoy calling each other baby, honey, hun, babe, ect. I love carson, but we're not going to kiss right now, ok? get it thru ur head, olivia! I <3 U, olivia!! tee hee. :D ks, everybody got it? good.

urg I DO NOT LIKE SUBJECTS!!!

Mon, 27 Dec 2004 20:55:06 GMT

nm going on here actually. just felt like updating for sum reason. im goin to teh campus life sleepover thingy tonight. should be fun. well..carson and i went to teh movies yesterday and..we held hands. :D tee hee. yea that sounds childish. emily was like "you should kiss him!" and i was like "um..." i dont think im ready for that. so...it was fun, anyway. oh well, g2g get ready. <3 :D

Merry Christmas! xoxoxo

Sat, 25 Dec 2004 21:06:13 GMT

Hey everybody! Hope you all have a good Christmas. I know I did. And tomorrow, Carson and I are going to see Fat Albert at teh movie theaters. I gots an mp3 player for xmas and purpley jeans! yay! and i gots sum other coolie stuffs too! yay!!! lots of cheetah print stuffs. ree loves cheetah prints stuffs! Merry Christmas again, everybody, and a Happy New Year!!!

The Twelve Pains Of Christmas

Fri, 24 Dec 2004 02:22:47 GMT

The First thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me is Finding a Christmas tree
The Second thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree
The Third thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Hangovers
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree
The Fourth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Sending Christmas cards
Hangovers
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree
The Fifth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Five months of bills!
Sending Christmas cards
Hangovers
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree
The sixth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Facing my inlaws
Five months of bills!
Oh, I hate those Christmas cards
Hangovers
Rigging up these lights!
And finding a Christmas tree
The seventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Salvation Army
Facing my inlaws
Five months of bills!
Sending Christmas cards
Oh geez!
I'm tryin to rig up these lights!
And finding a Christmas tree
The eighth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: I want a transformer, for Christmas!
Charities and whatta mean your inlaws?
Five months of bills!
Ugh, making up these cards
Why don't ya just get me a beer, eh?
What? We have no extension cords?!
And finding a Christmas tree
The ninth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Finding parking spaces
Daddy I want some candy!
Donations!
Facing my inlaws
Five months of bills!
Writing all those Christmas cards
Hangovers
Now why the hell are they blinking?!
And finding a Christmas tree
The tenth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Batteries not included
No parking spaces
Buy me sumthin!
Get a job, ya bum!
Oh, facing my inlaws
Five months of bills!
Yo ho, sending Christmas cards
Aw geez, look at this
One light goes out, they all go out!
And finding a Christmas tree
The eleventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Stale TV specials!
Batteries not included
No parking spaces
I gotta go to the bathroom!
Charities!
She's a witch, I hate her
Five months of bills!
Oh, I don't even know half these people
Oh, who's got the toilet paper?
Get a flashlight, I blew a fuse!
And finding a Christmas tree
The twelfth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Singing Christmas carols
Stale TV specials
Batteries not included
No parking?!
*Boy cries*
Charities
Gotta make 'em dinner
Five months of bills!
I'm not sending 'em this year, that's it!
Shut up, you!
Fine! You're so smart, YOU RIG UP THE LIGHTS!
And finding a Christmas tree

2 days till christmas

Thu, 23 Dec 2004 22:16:04 GMT

The 12th thing at christmas thats such a pain to me,
Singing christmas carols
Stale tv specials
Batteries not included
No parking?! (finding parking spaces)
*boy crys* (boy who nags)
Charities
Gotta make em dinner (facing inlaws)
5 months of bills!
I'm not sendin em this year, that's it! (sending christmas cards)
Shut up, you! (hangovers)
Fine! You're so smart, YOU RIG UP THE LIGHTS! (rigging up the lights)
And finding a christmas tree
I love that song, and if i had time, i'd type the entire thing for ya, but i might do that later. k, gotta go make dinner.

omg WHY DO WE NEED SUBJECTS???

Mon, 20 Dec 2004 01:43:25 GMT

i got all my christmas shopping done cept for carson. his mom got him a new chain so thats out of the question urg! oh well i'll prolly get him a gift card except he spent $30 dollars on me!! god, boy, r u nuts? i asked him if he was insane and he simply answered yes. lol. well, not much else has happened. i have to finish hw. urg much. oh well.

subject? what is teh point in subjects, anyway?

Sun, 19 Dec 2004 01:55:41 GMT

Taken from renegade_queen

1. Reply to this post, because I would like to say a couple words about you.
2. I will also tell you what song(s) remind me of you when I hear it.
3. I will also tell you what celebrity/public [or anime/manga] person you remind me of, either personality-wise or looks-wise.
4. I will also give ONE WORD that I associate with you when I think of you.
((5. We all could use a boost now and then, so steal this for your journal and make someone else's day as well.))

It shall tis be awesome! ask me! ask me, ask me, ask me!!!

GAH! THE DRAMA!!

Sun, 19 Dec 2004 01:32:22 GMT

we have officially decided we dont want to go to high school next year. too much drama now, what are we gonna do when there are 4 grades of ppl interfering with our lives as opposed to one!? GAH! MAKE THE DRAMA STOP!!! basically, what happened, is ehtna and i argued about trust. he trusts dalton caetlyn, and melanie. and thats it. well, i heard that dalton doesnt keep ethans secrets, and it went around in a circle from me to ethan to dalton to me to dalton to me to dalton to ethan to me to ethan to dalton to me. evilness. i hate drama. i hate aunt dot. i hate PMSing, cuz ethan PMSes and it rubs off on dalton and ben. evilness once more. MAKE IT STOP!!! OH MY FRICKIN WORD CUT THE DRAMA GOD PLEASE. PLEASE MAKE IT FRICKIN STOP!!! GAH!

How bout them steelers? #1 in the league. Thats right jerome, #1.

Stole it from sarah

Sat, 18 Dec 2004 18:53:45 GMT

stole this from renegade_queen (sari) so here it is:

1. Take your LJ username and replace each letter with the corresponding number (A=1, B=2, etc...).
2. Add all of the numbers together to create a kind of super number.
3. Add the digits of the number together.
4. Find the post of this number in your LJ. If you don't have that many posts, add the digits together again.
5. Take the digit you noted in step 3, and count that many words into the post.
6. Use the resulting word in a google image search, and select a picture from the first page and post the results.

TEH PICTURES TIS NOT WORKING!!!! Y???!!! Y MUST U DO THIS TO ME??? WHY!!??

ok, im officially done now. i only have alex and jillian and jason done for xmas presents (jason's one of 2 bros) im doing ethan's right now. cds. he better like em too lol. we're arguing about trust right now. thats it. ciao.

So many things...

Sat, 11 Dec 2004 14:12:09 GMT

Well, last Saturday was eventful. That past week melanie and i became pretty good friends and ethan got mad at me. he said that caet had thought maybe i was using melanie to get ethan to talk to me and in turn, like me. y would i do sumthing like that? thats absolutely ridiculous! and so i was like, "so u want me to give up my friendship with her to make u happy?" and he was like "no, i dont want u to talk to me, i dont want u to like me, and i dont want a friendship with you when u keep ruining it" i had to get off so the vet could call back and so i was like "i dont even kno where to begin, but i gotta get off, so i'll talk to u later." i cried for about a half hour, callin katie, didnt answer, manderz, didnt answer, kathleen, wasnt home, and finally got jessie so i could talk to her. then we realized hes a jerk and i dont need sum1 like that. then i called melanie and told her everything. she got mad at him and wouldnt talk to him. then monday 7th pd. ethan sent me a note and this is exactly what it said:

Rachel,
I want to apologize. Im really sorry for what I said Sat. I hope you can understand that I'm not like that. I was just angered by something I shouldn't have been mad about. I hope you can accept this apology. With the fact that [melanie] wont talk to me and you being mad at me makes me feel regretful. You prolly don't care that I'm apologizing, and neither does [melanie]. But I thought about it Sunday and I noticed I was a big jerk Saturday. I'm sorry for saying that I wanted our friendship to be over becuz I don't wish that. I was just mad at the moment
-Ethan-

now, idk if that was him being nice, which i highly doubt, or him trying to get her to talk to him. prolly the second one, but then even after i forgave him and she knew that, she still wouldnt talk to him. now, she wants him to apologize to her. he has nothing to apologize for! he didnt do anything to her! he did it to me, not to her. shes being ridiculous. she needs to kno that. anyway, ethan and i r ok, even though kayt says hes bipolar and i should forget him, and jess says my interaction with him scares her, or sumthing to that extent, idk. she confuses me sumtimes. but ne way, even though my friends will be disgusted, im goin out with carson. oh well. get over it. he likes me A LOT. and i like him too. so GET OVER IT! and then all the bball players were mad at me and stuff cuz of this whole thing with secret cheerleaders and im like on the edge of callin it off. im spirit captain for jv cheer so i can. ha. 10 foot bubble! oh, mad at sarah. yup, thats all. luv ya.
listen to wild christmas by huckapoo. wish that was me n ethan.

ethan?

Fri, 26 Nov 2004 02:23:58 GMT

She lay stretched out on her moms bed in front of the television, on her stomach. she wait for her mom to get home so she could get on the internet and talk to him. she called her friend on her cell. she said hes on and they're talking. she listened to the conversation between her friend and him, all of a sudden very hurt by sumthing he asked her friend. y must he hurt her? y cant he realize what he is doing to her? she thanked her friend, hung up, and cried quietly as she watched the visions on the television screen. she looked down, and her straight, brown hair, fell in her face and dried a single tear. she thought about the social studies test three days later, but couldnt bring herself to study. then she remebered math homework as well. no. she just couldnt. not with the thoughts of his feelings, feelings not of her, flooding her mind. the next few days werent any better. in fact, they got worse. now he tells her hes not sure if they're friends. she didnt hurt him. he hurt her. and deeply.

torn and hurt, upset, and wondering

Fri, 26 Nov 2004 01:54:25 GMT

i wonder if ethan and i will ever speak in person again. hes mad at me and even said he doesnt kno if we're friends right now. basically, me and melanie talked and i thought ethan should kno what she said, so i wrote a note to tell him cuz i didnt have time to tell him in person or on aim, and he got mad for me starting the convo, for me apparently thinking that i control her flirting, which i never said, and for giving him the paper in the first place. i just wish he would trust me like he trusts caetlyn. but thats not going to happen, bcuz hes "not trying to please me" and "im not one of those close to him", so i dont matter, basically. i feel like maybe i should just isolate myself from him, but whenever i try, i want him to trust me even more. i dont even necisarily like him anymore, i just want my friend ethan back. things were so much better at least when we were friends. and i want him to kno that. "i dont want to fall to pieces, i just wanna sit and stare at you, and i dont wanna talk about it, i dont want a conversation, i just wanna cry in front of you, i dont wanna talk about it, cuz im in love with you." its a song. fall to pieces by avril. it describes right now almost perfectly, its scary. but i wish i could show him this. im just afraid, even with calling her melanie, that he would get angry. well, maybe sumone can help me. i dont think anyone can bcuz i feel so alone. i just wanna cry in front of you. thats all. i dont wanna talk about it, cuz im in love with you. listen to it, its good. well, one more thing, we miss you freddie mercury. we love you.

:ish: confused

Sat, 20 Nov 2004 18:57:57 GMT

fun night was last night. not that bad i guess. steph got queen. she voted for herself 72 times and molly voted for her 4 times. they were all on the top. thats insane, cuz steph spent $18 to get a plastic crown. whats the point. and billy c won king, but he wasnt there, so brandon m won. anyways, ethan said it was fun, too, but sumthing happened 3rd period that he didnt find out until last night and he wont tell me and caetlyn's not home. he told me to ask her. urg. i must know! and now i am confused because i must wait until caetlyn gets back to know. and ethans off. again. grr. and emilys going home. noooo. i must spend time! ok, done. ttyl

y does this happen to me? me?

Sun, 14 Nov 2004 19:13:46 GMT

Last night I attended the worst fball game of my life. in terms of, no one to hang out with. ethan didnt talk to me very much at all. all he did was complain the entire time. "im ready to call it a day" "boy, im tired" "i think i might go home" he can go home cuz he could just walk home. and it definitely wasnt as fun as a new oxford game. this was teh mechanicsburg and gettysburg game at new oxford's field, and not many new oxford ppl were there. so twoards the end, when the game went into overtime, i said "ethan, u havent talked to me very much today" and he goes "well i talked to the past 2 days, ive ran out of stuff to talk about." yea, ok, ill take that, i guess. but it kinda bothered me, cuz if he wanted to, im sure we coulda ditched ben and walked around. we woulda thought of sumthin to talk about. i thought of sum stuff b4 hand that i wanted to talk about. and it isnt stuff u can really talk about over teh internet. like stuff about bein friends n such. idk, but maybe tomorrow will b betta. i hope. luv ya and ill keep ya posted.

not much....

Sat, 13 Nov 2004 19:03:01 GMT

havent talked to ethan since yesterday, but im too upset about it ne more. we get to go to teh fball game tonite. it shouldnt rain. thank u god. its gunna be so much fun. i hope. zach wants to cum. i've nvr met this kid in person. hes in 7th grade. a year yunger. idc, i just dont want him hangin around me the whole time. well, ne ways, ill keep ya'll posted. luv ya.

Emo Boyfriend
Name
DOB
Favourite Color
His Name	Aaron
His Looks/Style	Curly-ish brown hair, brown eyes, tan skin, labret pierced, tight tshirts, tight pants, skate shoes
How you met	At a Taking Back Sunday show
How he tells you he loves you	Gives you flowers every day
What he calls you	Princess
How far you've gone	you lost your virginity to each other

This quiz by _shelovedaboy - Taken 72833 Times. </a>

Which Sin Are You?
Name
DOB
Favourite Color
You are...	Greed

This fun quiz by chibigarm - Taken 230592 Times. </a>